Thursday, March 17, 2011

The journey of many hearts now beats as ONE

She's here, she's actually here!!! 
Makai Kimber Johnston was born on March 1st at 11:48pm

She weighed 7 lbs 1 oz & was 17 1/2" long

She has tons of beautiful auburn hair & is quite possibly the most adorable lil' angel EVER!

When I hold her in my arms & she snuggles right up onto my shoulder,my heart melts & everything is just as it is meant to be. I honestly can't imagine our family without her in it now. I used to say when we were trying for another baby that I didn't understand how I could miss someone so much that I didn't even know. It was like I longed for & missed this little girl that I didn't know, didn't know how or when she would be brought into our family. And now here she is. And there have been so many different little tender mercies along the road to get her here that truly made me realize that Heavenly Father was watching over the situation the whole time, as he always does. It makes me feel more than so loved & blessed.

The first time that she got placed into my arms was just minutes after she was born & I cannot even describe the feelings & emotions that were going on inside of me. I got to feed her her first bottle & so I sat down in the rocker in the room & looked down at her in my arms & it was literally a dream being realized. I had seen that EXACT image in my dreams 7 1/2 years ago. For those of you that don't know I had had this dream of  myself holding a baby girl with lots of brown hair (I do realize that it is more auburn, but before she got all washed up it looked a little bit more brown, just like the dream) in a rocking chair in a hospital room & I had this dream for a week straight, until I finally told Mike that I thought we were supposed to have another baby. We got pregnant that next month, but imagine my surprise when a blonder than blond hair baby BOY was who was meant to come next. I thought, hmmm, where is this little girl I saw in my dream? But I will tell you what, that image of that dream is what got me through many a low points. Because even though it has been a lot longer of a road than I would've  thought to get her here, I knew she'd get her somehow, someway. So there she was, in my arms, in the rocking chair, in the hospital room & I just said the simplest of prayers in my head. And though it may have been simple, because it was just me saying "Thank you, Thank you", it felt like one of the most powerful prayers I've ever said. I felt that same gratitude towards the birth mom. The strength that she's shown throughout this whole thing is amazing. The love that I know that she has for Makai is beautiful, that she was able to do that for Makai & for our family is beyond words.

The day that we were able to go & pick Makai up from the hospital & bring her home was such an emotional day. My nerves were on level a billion as we were about to leave the house. And then another small miracle, as we are driving down the street, I looked out the car window & there it was, a full rainbow. I just burst into tears, that rainbow held so many meanings to me & I know it wasn't just a coincidence that it was there in that moment. I could go on & on about just how many meanings it had for me, but I will just say this, you really do need sun & rain to make something come about as beautiful as a rainbow. And there has definitely been sun & a lot of rain on this journey, but we got something so beautiful out of it that the beauty of a rainbow can't even compare with. And her name is Makai.